I've been in an unofficial relationship with BL for about 2 months. We never meet, but through emails and telephone conversation, the feeling to each other just developed into a different stage, don't know since when.
The feeling of betrayal is tearing me apart. Although some people might think that I deserve better than my current BF, but....I still love him. Whenever he did something not right, like last week, he apologized, and 'compensated'. Perhaps I just forgive people too easily?
The thought of telling BL about I want to call it a stop between me and him, was running in my mind these 2 weeks. But whenever I hear his voice, my heart just melted, and don't know how to tell him about that.
But today, through emails, I finally told him about what I think. He seems expected this and accepted it right away, and ask me not to worry because he will make things easy for me. Maybe....he didn't fall as deep as I thought, or as deep as I do. After reading what he wrote in the email, my heart felt so pain suddenly. I'm thinking: Am I too greedy and selfish?
I just wanted to be fair to BL, since I can't promise him anything right now, and shouldn't have keep dragging with him. But why on earth my heart feel so painful when I managed to do that?
I never hate myself this much like now. Lik, please forgive me if you ever read this OK?
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2 comments:
this is the 3rd case that I seens ... Good or bad who knows?
You mean this happened to your other friends too? But like the otherguy who scolded last 2 weeks, I really deserve for this, since it's my choice.
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